The Real Housewives of Madrid

I have found my way to fortune, or so I hope. I am a junkie when it comes to the Real Housewives franchise, produced by Bravo. I am completely bummed that I am missing the New Jersey reunion show and am trying to figure out how I'm going to watch it over here. (Sidenote: anyone know where I can watch full episodes of Grey's online? ABC won't let people outside the U.S. watch them. What Debbie Downers they are :( I would greatly appreciate the help!) I have decided that Bravo needs to branch out into the international market and start a series in Madrid. And I know where they can find some people....

Where I'm living in Madrid is right on the edge of the city. In the "burbs", there are more chalets (what we would call townhouses) than in the city, simply because there is more room and a lack of demand for high-rise apartment buildings. A benefit to staying away from downtown - most of the complexes out this way have swimming pools. And let me tell you, after spending thirty minutes in the pits of the earth, A.K.A. the metro, the only thing you want to do is jump in the pool. (For those of you who didn't believe me in yesterday's blog when I said the metro line I take most frequently is at the center of the earth, I beg to differ. Today while in transit, I had to transfer lines. I had to take 5 huge escalators - each one is equal to two regular sized escalators - in order to reach the level of the line I needed to switchover to!) Everyday, around 5:00, a group of women converge at the pool, kids in tow, and proceed to gossip. Today they kicked off the weekend with cigarettes, beers, and potato chips. Wouldn't be my pick, but hey, whatever floats your boat, right?

Elena has filled me in on each woman. There is a woman named Julie* (names have been changed to protect identity) who has a daughter that is less than one. Yesterday, Elena said that the little girl looks exactly like the father, and that it was a shame, because the father is feo (ugly). I've seen him for myself and he's really not good-looking at all. But, he is a gynecologist who has been married three times, and according to Elena, this probably won't be his last marriage. He spends ten days in Madrid and then twenty days in the UK. The reason for going back and forth is so he can perform certain practices that are illegal in Spain, in the UK and vice versa. Anything to make more money, huh? Honestly, he seems overly cocky and kind of sleazy. There is also another woman and I can't recall her name, but she looks old enough to be someone's grandmother. We're going to call her Big Bertha. She seems to be the ringleader of the group and apparently, is the one who does the most talking and thinks she knows everything about everybody. If anyone has a better nickname for her, please contact management immediately! Then there are several other minions who clamor to B.B. and company. Elena calls them "The Housewives" because all they do is "stay at home and spend the entire day at the pool". Must be nice. Yes, I spent 6 hours at the pool yesterday, and 5 more today, but after Wednesday, I will be a busy bee. I'm going to call them RHOM (Real Housewives of Madrid). Stay tuned to this saga, I know I will have more to share.

There are also two new families who have just moved in within the past few weeks. One family is a Cuban father, a Dutch mother, and their son, Martin. Then, there is another family that has a Guatemalan mother, Suzanna, a Swiss father, and two kids, Diego and Valeria. It makes me sick that these families are multi-lingual. Martin is fluent in Spanish and Dutch. His mother, Janine, speaks both languages as well. Suzanna's husband is a Swiss diplomat who is fluent in German, Italian, French, and Spanish. (Switzerland has three official languages.) Suzanna speaks English, so I'm pretty sure the husband speaks that also. The kids are spoken to in Spanish and Italian at home, and then are attending a French school in the fall. I am insanely jealous of them all! And here I am, trying to get back in the groove of Spanish. It is so impressive that these children are being raised multi-lingual. I mean, no wonder the guy is a diplomat - how many companies are going to turn you down when you tell them you're fluent in five languages?! I want to be like him when I grow up....

I spent my morning walking down to the tobacco store to purchase my metro pass. Is it me or does it make sense that the only place you can buy your metro pass at is the tobacco store? Especially since the entire network of transportation in Madrid is smoke-free? What torture! I also walked into a bank to inquire about opening an account there. I am finding out that I really can't do anything here until I get my student residency card. And who knows how long that will take!

After that, I went to Puerta del Sol, which is in the center of the city, literally. It is also at the center of Spain, and there is even a plaque in the ground that recognizes this. I was surprised at how easily I navigated my way through the streets. I stopped by a Corte Ingles. The one in Sol is so big, they need two buildings to house them in. Oh and by the way, I counted seven floors in each building. The only item I bought was a small fan that sits on a table. It only cost nine euros, but it is worth a million dollars to me right now. That fan is on full blast as we speak. I have woke up during the past two nights in cold sweat, gasping for air, because the heat is so suffocating. I think I have found my solution.

Elena is on-call this weekend, but she is almost positive that she will have to go in since it's the weekend. If she does, I will be staying at home with the kids. I guess we'll be spending more time at the pool with the RHOM group.

Oh, and if anyone has Skype, please let me know. Skype has quickly become my new best friend. I can't let all of you forget my beautiful face - it would be murder to do so! Also, if anyone is interested in having my address to send care packages, I will be more than happy to pass that along :)

Quote of the Day: "The world is round and the place which may seem like the end may also be only the beginning." -Ivy Baker Priest